» HUMMINGBIRD HEARTBEAT //

[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | HOPE IT'S OKAY! Twenty years was a long time. Casey knew that. As far as she knew, Logan could be happily married with kids. Casey had part of that once. Well, married with kids, she'd had. That had lasted a while. The happy bit, she'd had for a little while. But that hadn't lasted for very long. And in the back of her mind, she'd always remembered Logan Harding. Was she in love with him? She was never really sure. They technically weren't even together, so she didn't know. It was all a little ridiculous, honestly. But Casey wouldn't have had it any other way. For so long she had been gone, she had never forgotten Logan. Always wondered if he remembered her, if he still missed her too. And now, moving back to Capeside, she had worked up enough courage to go see him again. She got his address from her brother and then verified it with the address book, and now she was just standing there in front of the door, mustering up the courage to even knock on it. If a woman answered the door.. She would most likely claim to have the wrong address and run away with burning cheeks. Though why, she didn't know. After all, it was Logan. She was the one who had run away and never looked back. She had gotten married. Why shouldn't he have, too? She hoped he was happy, though. She really did. Casey would be beyond heartbroken if she found out that he wasn't happy anymore. Casey had always been a motherly person, she shielded people from harm, she didn't want anyone she knew unhappy. Running away probably did nothing for this, but she couldn't take being there without Casper. Her twin brother had meant everything to her. She couldn't just get over it.   Would she even recognize her old friend, though? Would he recognize her? Keeping in mind that she was twenty years older and she'd had three children, she was not as petite as she was in high school and goodness knows she had more wrinkles. This was actually really terrifying to her. But she'd never been afraid of seeing Logan before. Was she being silly? Of course she was. She at least owed him an apology. She reached up and knocked, taking a step back and stared at the door, her hands folded behind her back, anxiously chewing her lip while she waited to see if he'd even open the door. If he didn't, would it mean he wasn't there or he recognized her and was angry, though? No, Logan wouldn't do that to her. Though.. Twenty years.. No, she was just psyching herself out.

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[inclined]

{Ugh, not my best but I hope this is okay! I'm still a little rusty, so bear with me.}

Logan had just finished changing the oil in his truck when he heard Trigger burst out in a series of rather obnoxious barks from inside the house. What was it now? He quickly grabbed the nearest grease rag, wiped his hands and headed inside to see what was bothering the dog. "Trigger, hush. What is it?". The boxer mix was standing by the door, whimpering and wagging his tail now. He sighed and went over to the door, sure that the dog had only heard the mailman go by. After all, it wasn't like Logan got regular visitors here. Especially without getting a phone call first. As Logan glanced through the peephole he was taken slightly by surprise. An attractive looking woman with blonde hair stood at his door step, looking rather anxious from what he could tell. Why did she look so familiar?

He went to open the door but quickly stopped himself. His eyes shot down to assess his attire. The light grey t-shirt he threw on earlier was riddled with oil smears and God knows what else. His dark blue jeans fared no better, with holes in both knees and just as many oil stains. Oh well, there was nothing he could do about it now. He quickly ran a hand through his dirty blonde hair and grasped the door knob. As soon as he opened it, he felt his heart skip a beat. No, it couldn't be... could it? His brows furrowed, studying her features, before shooting up in surprise. "Casey?" The name sounded odd as it slipped off his tongue. Was she really here, standing two feet in front of him? He stood there speechless for a few seconds, just taking it all in. She was beautiful, to say the least. Perhaps even more beautiful than he had remembered. Had it really been twenty years?

The day she left was still burned in the back of his mind. He knew she had taken it hard when her brother had died, and he understood that. But what he still couldn't understand was why she hadn't said goodbye. I mean, after three years, didn't he at least deserve that? Twenty years hadn't really done much to dull the pain and confusion of loosing his best friend that day. For years he had waited for a phone call, a letter, something - anything just to know she was okay. But nothing ever came. He wouldn't admit it, but it hurt knowing she could just leave like that. They had always talked to each other about everything... so why couldn't she talk to him about this? He did his best to forgive her and move on though. After all, she had always been pretty complex in his mind. That was one of the things he had always loved about her...

Suddenly Logan realized that his dumbfounded reaction probably made him look like an idiot. He shifted his weight and ran another nervous hand through his hair, trying to form a cohesive sentence. "Uhh, sorry, I just - I'm a little surprised to see you here" he stampered, still slightly in shock. He wondered if he should invite her in or not. His house wasn't exactly tidy at the moment, but it would be rude not to ask, right? Why was he even thinking about this? This was Casey for crying out loud. He had waited twenty years for this moment and now he couldn't even think straight. What the hell was wrong with him? He didn't know what to say; what to do... instead he just stood there like an idiot and anxiously waited for her to say something to ease his racing mind...

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[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | NO, IT WAS GREAT! (: Casey jumped almost a foot in the air when she heard the bark of a dog. She was so on edge about this entire thing. Maybe it really was a bad idea. Maybe she should leave after all. On one hand, it certainly would be nice to see him. On the other, she still didn't know if he could be angry at her or not. She'd never contacted him again, after all. He reminded her too much of her home. Her family. Her brother. She couldn't think about her brother. Not without breaking down, anyway. He was her twin, her other half. She would hope that Logan would at the very least understand that. But even though she had never contacted him, he'd never followed her, either, to the best of her knowledge. He hadn't found her. Wasn't that just as bad? Probably not. Was she terrible for this? Did it make her a bad person to run away like she had? She did feel truly horrific about it. She wasn't ready to face him after all; was she? Maybe she should leave. Pretend this never even happened. Come back when she was sure she wouldn't burst into tears as soon as she saw him. But before she could, he opened the door, catching Casey with an expression like a deer in headlights. How had she had ever thought she wouldn't recognize him? He looked.. Exactly the same. Older, but still.. handsome as ever.  "Logan.." She whispered back, her expression still slightly terrified. She didn't know what to say. She had imagined this moment for years, but she had never known what she would say to him. Never known how to explain herself, her selfish actions. There was a horrible awkward silence and the two adults stood there staring at one another for a moment until he spoke again. And though she knew they weren't meant to be, his words sounded absolutely terrible. He was surprised to see her there.  That was never something Casey and Logan should never have had to say to one another. They'd been so close, after all. No one had expected them to lose touch. Including, if not especially, Casey. They'd never been surprised when the other turned up out of the blue. They'd just acknowledged it to be a staple part in their lives. Slowly, she cracked a tiny, hopeful smile. "I.. Probably should have called first.." then there was a slight pause. "But I never did before.. I didn't think about it. I'm sorry. Do you want me to come back later? Is this a bad time?" her words were choppy, breathy, she could barely force them out. So, was this the worst reunion of all time, or what? They were just standing there staring at each other awkwardly. You'd never think these were the legendary Casey and Logan of Capeside a good twenty years before. Basically everyone had known about them. They were inseparable, like Casey had been with her brother before he slipped through her innocent fingers to try a new world that she had positively no interest in. Even though the bond she had with Logan was positively much different than the one with her twin.

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[inclined]

>> i know that people say we're never going to make it

Logan knew he probably should have tried to contact her. If he could go back in time, that would be one thing he would change. But he figured she needed time to heal. She and Logan had always talked about everything. And if she didn't think she could come to him about this, let alone bare to tell anyone she was leaving, then he assumed she wanted her space. So that's what he gave her. Thinking back, maybe he gave her a little too much space. Maybe he should have tried harder; fought harder. Was that what she wanted? Would that have changed anything? Life was just full of 'maybe's' and 'what-if's' these days. But all the 'maybe's' in the world couldn't change what had happened, no matter how much he regretted how it had played out. History was history. He could only hope it wouldn't repeat itself. She was here now, and maybe this was his second chance. He was determined not to blow it this time...

>> but i know we're going to get through this

As soon as he heard her voice, his mind eased a little. Although, he could tell she felt just as uncomfortable as he did. He hated how awkward this was. It wasn't supposed to be like this... but I guess twenty years had a way of changing things. No matter how much he hated it, it was a fact. And he hoped more than anything that they could fix it. What he would give for things to go but to the way they were. Back before life got so complicated. That was crazy though, right? They weren't kids anymore. But had things really changed that much? Could they start over? It might be a little crazy, but Logan never was one to back down from a challenge. He was more than willing to give it a shot. I mean, every journey had to start somewhere. And this was definitely one he wasn't going to pass up. Now, if only she felt the same way... her next words interrupted his thoughts and he saw her crack a tiny smile. It was a small, subtle one; barely noticeable. But he felt his heart fluttered in his chest at the sight of it. He had missed her smile so much... but then he noticed her face change. 'Maybe I should come back later. Is this a bad time?'.

>> close your eyes and please don't let me go

"God, no." he said quickly, suddenly feeling bad for his reaction. The last thing he wanted her to do was leave, or feel like he wasn't happy to see her. Which was not true. In fact, he was more than happy to see her. He was ecstatic. He had waited twenty years just to see her face again; to hear her voice... and here she was, watching him make a fool of himself. "I'm sorry, I guess you just caught me a little off-guard, that's all. I'm sorry." he said again, his words still trying to find their way out of his jumbled brain. "It's so great to see you; really. How have you been?" It seemed like a cliche question to ask, but it's really all he could think of. What else could he really say? 'Long time, no see'? "Would you like to come in?" he asked finally, opening the door wider to invite her inside. "I won't bite, I promise. I can't say the same for Trigger, though." he said, a smile dancing across his face as he tried to lighten the mood.

>> don't let me let you go

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word count -- 592
listening to -- angels and airwaves
lyrics -- 'take my hand' simple plan
template -- me :]
notes -- meh xD still not very good. hope you like it though!

[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | HOPE IT'S OKAY! Casey visibly relaxed when Logan told her not to leave after all. That meant he couldn't be too angry, right? At least he was being civil about it, anyway. She shifted her weight uncomfortably as she watched him attempt to apologize. "No, please, don't apologize," she shook her head pleadingly. Last thing she wanted was to do was make him feel bad about her own problems. "I.. I should have called.." she repeated herself quietly, looking down. His apologizing only made her feel even guiltier. However, Casey couldn't help but smile softly when he told her that it was great to see her. "I missed you," she blurted instead of informing him that it was great to see him too, but it basically meant the same thing, didn't it? She didn't want to ignore his next question, but she most certainly didn't want to answer it, either. Not until she was certain he didn't resent her for running off like she had, and couldn't make her feel like if she had stayed with him she wouldn't have gone through what she had. But it was Logan. He would never say anything like that. Not the Logan Casey had known, anyway. How was she even supposed to tell him? "I got married to an abusive alcoholic, I had four kids, then I ran away from him too, look who has a pattern going for her!" However, it wasn't as if she completely regretted marrying her ex husband. If she hadn't, she wouldn't have four beautiful, wonderful children, after all. Her ex could do a lot of things to her, to make her life miserable, but he could never take her babies from him. But how to bring up all of these things? Casey didn't know anything about him anymore. Would it hurt to know that he had kids, if he did? Would it hurt him? She hoped not. Casey had never intended on hurting him in the first place. Even though she didn't want to upset him with the truth: absolutely horrible, she didn't want to lie and say that she had been doing good since her leaving. "I'm.. Well, I'm okay." she finally managed to choke out, looking down, reaching up and scratching the back of her neck anxiously. "How about you?" Casey asked in return, looking back up again with worried eyes. He looked well enough, though on further inspection his clothes weren't exactly clean.. But that had never been something that Logan ever cared about. Her eyebrows raised slightly as he asked her if she wanted to come in, and her smile returned. "Oh.. Okay." She nodded slowly and took a tentative step in, taking a quiet look around at the house curiously as she entered. "I came to apologize." she said as she surveyed the house, looking down as she noticed the dog and smiled. That must be the Trigger that Logan had talked about. "Hii, puppy," she cooed, reaching down so he could sniff her hand.

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[inclined]

_{* IT'S A LONG SHOT, BABY}

- - - i know it's true, but if anyone can make it

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{I'm bettin' on me and you}[/font]

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'I missed you' as soon as the words left her mouth, Logan couldn't help but feel a lump form in his throat. She had missed him. It meant so much to know that. Not that he wanted her to be miserable without him, and he hoped that she hadn't been, but just to know that she hadn't forget about him; it meant a lot. It meant that maybe she cared about him as much as he cared about her. Maybe he wasn't a total idiot for thinking she was the only girl he could ever love. "I missed you too" more than you know... the last part he kept silent, trying to form a small smile. But he meant it more than anything. He never understood why he couldn't forget about her. Why he could never really move on. Sure, he had hooked up with a few other women over the course of twenty years, but he found himself comparing them to Casey. It just wasn't the same. He couldn't talk to them like he could with her. He felt stupid for doing it, after all, he didn't really have a reason to believe he'd ever see her again - but that still never stopped him from hoping...

Her answer to his question as to how she had been made him feel a little anxious. He certainly always hoped that she had found happiness. He felt a twinge of pain at the thought that maybe she hadn't. "I've been good" he said cautiously, answering her next question. As he studied her worried face, he noticed the difference in her eyes for the first time. It made him wonder what had happened to harden what was once bright and innocent. What had she gone through? What had she seen? It killed him not knowing. Suddenly he wanted nothing more than to just wrap her up in his arms and make it all better like he had used to when something was bothering her. But he held himself back. He couldn't; not yet. He needed to know why she was here first. Every fine line in her face told a story, and he wanted to know everything... Had she moved on? Gotten married, had kids? The thought gave him a weird feeling of mixed emotions. It wasn't like he hadn't expected her to, he just couldn't imagine her with some guy he didn't know... whatever had happened though, he hoped that she was happy. That was really all that mattered.

He closed the door behind them as she walked into the house. "Sorry it's kind of a mess" he said, looking around to make sure it wasn't too horrible. He didn't think she would mind, she had never minded before, but he felt nervous for some reason. I came to apologize' he heard her say. There was a pause and he walked up beside her. "Casey, you don't have to apologize" he said softly, shooting her a reassuring look. The last thing he wanted was for her to think he was mad at her. He might have been upset at one time, but that had passed. He had forgiven her the best he could, and there was no need to dwell in the past. "It was a long time ago." he added, taking a deep breath and running another hand through his hair. He could tell she felt bad about it, and he didn't want to make it worse by her thinking he was giving her a guilt trip.

Logan saw a glimmer of the old Casey as she knelt down and offered the dog her hand, and he couldn't help but smile. Trigger sniffed it anxiously, giving it a small lick before jumping back and running off nervously. Logan let out a small chuckle. "He likes to act shy. Just wait til he warms up to you". His smile faded slowly as he made eye contact with her again. "God, you're beautiful" he said suddenly, the hushed words escaping his mouth before he could think twice. He didn't know what it was, but he couldn't take his eyes off of her. He cleared his throat and shifted his glance around the room before turning it to the ground. "I'm sorry" he said nervously, a small chuckle emitting from his throat as he shook his head, not believing that he had said it out-loud. Wow, he wasn't helping this whole awkward thing. He let out a small breath and paused before he went on. "So, what brings you back to Capeside?" he asked as casually as he could, still a little cautious as his eyes returned to her face.[/blockquote]

-- WORDS 775
-- TAGS Casey
-- INSPIRATION Lifehouse - You and Me
-- NOTES Trying out a new template. Sorry this reply took me a bit. Hope it's okay!
-- LYRICS Once in a Lifetime - Keith Urban
-- TEMPLATE CREDIT Edited by myself. Font and color scheme by Arro @ Caution 2.0

[/blockquote]

[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | (: Casey could feel tears springing to her eyes when Logan told her that he missed her as well. She wasn't sure if it hurt more or less knowing that he missed her as much as she had. To know that he'd gone through the same thing that she had for so long, and it was all her fault. All she'd have to do was pick up a phone and call his number, she knew it by heart. Why hadn't she put aside her own pain for his? Why was she so selfish? She fought back a sob at that, and instead faked a smile for him. She didn't want him to feel so bad, even worse, on her account. She nodded slightly as he informed her that he'd been doing good for the past twenty years, and she smiled more genuinely this time. "I'm glad." She said softly. He stopped to study her face, and she paused, staring back at him and wondering what he could be thinking.   Casey didn't know about Logan, but she had changed so much since she'd left Capeside. Since her failed marriage, anyway, she'd become a lot more wary of the world, she didn't trust as easily as she once had, it was probably very obvious to Logan now that she thought about. She ducked her head once she realized that, looking down at her shoes like they were the most interesting things in the world. She looked back behind her as he closed the door, and then smiled again, this time with a little more meaning. "Oh, I don't mind at all. When were you ever clean, anyway?" She asked with a short chuckle, as she turned away again.   "Yes I do!" Casey then insisted, wagging her finger in the air in a very mother-like fashion until she realized what she was doing and then brought her hand back down with a sheepish laugh. "There's never an expiration date on apologizing." She continued, raising her eyebrows. No, there was no way he was going to get her to wiggle out of apologizing, she'd already made up her mind about it. Her mind was made up on this now, she'd feel even worse about it if she didn't tell him how sorry she was about this whole ordeal. After all, it was all her fault.   Casey's eyes softened as the dog licked her hand and ran off. She straightened up again and looked back at Logan as he explained that he was only acting shy, and she smiled. Up until he decided to conjure up a compliment, and instead of responding, she felt her cheeks turn a rosy pink, and she blinked, her mouth opening slightly like she wanted to say something but she couldn't figure out what exactly she wanted to say, and it closed again a moment later as he apologized, and she looked down and smiled softly. "No worries.. you're not so bad yourself." She peeked back up at Logan with a small grin.   Why she had come back to Capeside was to be with her family. Her children, to be more exact, who had moved to her old hometown. Should she just tell him that, though? Should she wait until he was sitting down? Maybe she should just come right out and say it. Maybe.. "My kids." She blurted, and then her hand shot up to cover her mouth. Well, there went her breaking it to him gently. At least she had the element of surprise.. Even though the element of surprise was not something she wanted to have while bringing up her children to her old friend.

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[inclined]

_{* IT'S A LONG SHOT, BABY}

- - - i know it's true, but if anyone can make it

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{I'm bettin' on me and you}[/font]

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Logan couldn't help but let a smile spread across his face as she insisted on apologizing. She held her hand in the air firmly before dropping it with a grin that Logan found adorable. He could feel the tension begin to dissipate as the conversation unraveled and they began to converse the way they had used to. Maybe this wouldn't have to be as bad as he had originally thought. He chuckled softly and shook his head at her persistence. That was Casey, alright. She always had been stubborn, rivaling even Logan's hard-headedness. "Okay, I guess I can't argue with that. Apology accepted" he added the last part a little more genuinely. He knew it wasn't all her fault; they both had shared some fault in the fall-out. But he could tell the apology must have weighed heavily on her mind, even after all these years. He was just glad she had decided to come back. When he thought about it, it was a pretty brave thing to do. For all she knew, he could have been bitter. Thinking back, he was glad that he had decided not to hold any nasty grudges. "I'm sorry that I didn't try harder, though. I guess I was just a little confused..." he said carefully, so as not to make her feel bad.

He watched as her cheeks flushed and her eyes shot to the floor at his compliment, making her even more adorable. He hadn't really meant to say it out-loud, but at least he had meant it, because there was no taking it back now. Funny how when your brain shuts down and your heart takes over, you speak only the truth. It isn't always a bad thing though, he supposed. He was glad to have gotten it off his chest. Her reply made him smirk slightly, a small chuckle escaping his upturned mouth. "Well thank you" he said a little jokingly, quickly shifting his eyes to meet hers before looking away again. Admittedly, he was a little anxious to change the subject. He was dying to know what brought her here, how she had been, what she had done with her life... he could feel that there was something different about her. And if she was still the same Casey that he remembered, and he was still as in-tune with her as he used to be, he could tell that something was up. Something had brought her back to Capeside; and to his door. He didn't think it was all just guilt, either. But he wasn't exactly prepared for what she said next. 'My kids.'

Kids? Logan's brows shot up a little in surprise. Well, that was interesting. There went trying to mask his emotions. He opened his mouth to say something then closed it again, words not coming readily to his aid. He paused for a minute, letting it soak in. It wasn't like he hadn't expected her to move on with her life, it was just not something he had envisioned. I guess he just wasn't prepared to see her as a mother. But now that he thought about it, it made total sense. And he was sure she made a fantastic mom. She was always good with kids. Logan? Not so much. He had always admired how well she could relate with them. I guess it seemed right that she should have her own. But that meant she had met someone. And that wasn't exactly something Logan wanted to think about. The thought suddenly made him feel a little more uncomfortable again, and he felt the tension creeping back into the air. "Wow, sorry. That's... great. I'm happy for you." he said, forcing a small smile and rubbing the back of his neck nervously as he tried not to sound like a total moron. Wow, he needed to work on that...

"Umm, so... how old are they?" he asked, hitting himself inside for how juvenile he sounded. If they lived here, he wondered if he had seen them around. Not that he really socialized with people a lot, let alone younger people; which he assumed they would be. Right? This messed up everything he'd imagined. But it seemed wrong of him to think she hadn't done the things that he knew would make her happy. Like having kids. Casey had kids. She was a mom. Wow. God knows why, but he still had trouble wrapping his mind around the whole thing. He was really bad at this whole 'catching up' thing. He knew he was probably making her feel bad. Which was stupid. It's not like she was 'his' or anything. She was his best friend, yes. But never really 'his'. His heart sank a little at the thought. He'd never thought of it like that before. I guess he always thought that somehow they just belonged together. No one else fit in the equation. Then the realization hit him. She was a grown women now. She was free to make her own decisions, and it wasn't fair to think she hadn't found someone else to take care of her. It was his duty to be happy for her, and that was all. So that's what he vowed to do. He stuffed his hands in his pockets and anxiously waited for her to reply, hoping he hadn't completely made this situation more awkward than it needed to be...[/blockquote]

-- WORDS 919
-- TAGS Casey
-- INSPIRATION Drops of Jupiter - Boyce Avenue
-- NOTES Sorry, got a little carried away on this one xD hope you like it!
-- LYRICS Once in a Lifetime - Keith Urban
-- TEMPLATE CREDIT Edited by myself. Font and color scheme by Arro @ Caution 2.0

[/blockquote]

[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | I FEEL LIKE MIBE RATHER PALES IN COMPARISON XD HOPE IT'S OKAY! Casey's smile softened as Logan accepted the apology before she could even say all that she wanted to say. But she supposed sooner or later it would all come out in the open anyway, wouldn't it? Her kids, her ex husband, her life in Texas, Casey had never been very good at hiding things from people she cared about and that hadn't changed at all with Logan. She had a bit of a big mouth, honestly, she wasn't entirely proud of it but it was what it was, and at least she was honest most of the time, right? She wasn't really all too sure how to respond to his own apology, it was unnecessary, but she had insisted on apologizing so she wasn't going to take away his own right, so she just shook her head. "Already forgiven," She said softly, clasping her hands behind her back.  A small giggle escaped from Casey's own lips at Logan's reaction to her little compliment. "You're welcome." she smiled. Well, that hadn't been quite as awkward as she had thought it would be. Still a little bit iffy, but much better than she had thought she would react to something like that, a random compliment coming up in the conversation. She did however, wonder what he would think of what she'd done with herself, her marriage in shambles, her occupation being simply a librarian, something she quite enjoyed though not something a lot of people would peg her to be. She wasn't sure how it would come up in the conversation, until she spilled a part of it right there without even thinking.  Casey could feel her cheeks flushing again as Logan reacted to her statement, and she quietly looked everywhere but him and his shocked, slightly hurt face until he spoke. Well, that was genuine. She only blinked, however, trying to figure out which part he was struggling at. The kids part, or the obvious marriage part? Because there was no possible way that Casey would ever have kids without getting married to the guy first. She may not have a lot of class, in her own opinion, but she had enough to not make herself look like a fool; twenty years old, pregnant and single? No, thank you. She would not have enjoyed that at all. Why had she married him, though? Casey had thought she loved him, she had thought he loved her too, but apparently that was either completely false or became untrue over time, they really hadn't known each other for too long before they had gotten married, maybe that was her problem, she simply hadn't known him well enough. "Twenty five, twenty two, and nineteen." Casey said, unable to hold back the evident pride she had in her children. She couldn't help herself, they were her babies, after all, all grown up. Her three children, who she would never trade the years of abuse for. They were worth it. Why she hadn't left earlier was the only question she had asked herself for so long. Certainly not for the kids, they were subject to the abuse as much as she had been, maybe not the boys so much, but even witnessing it must have been hard, she supposed she had only stayed with him in hopes that he would change, for the better this time. That had certainly backfired, though, hadn't it? You couldn't blame her, though, he had been her husband. Maybe not the love of her life as she had once suspected, but her husband, yes. "Brandon, Harry, and Lucy." She expanded then, looking back up at him again suspiciously, wondering if he'd even noticed she wasn't wearing a wedding ring. She had sent that back to her ex along with the divorce papers. She had considered just selling it, but Casey wasn't heartless. Just because she hated him didn't mean she would just sell his ring.

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[inclined]

_{* IT'S A LONG SHOT, BABY}

- - - i know it's true, but if anyone can make it

[/i]
{I'm bettin' on me and you}[/font]

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Logan nodded his head slowly as she relayed the names and ages of her children with the kind of pride only a mother would have for her offspring. He smiled softly and tried to make up for his poor reaction. Again. "You must really love them." he said sincerely, meeting her rich hazel eyes with his own blue ones. He could tell she did, even just from hearing her say their names. The pride shone in her eyes. Honestly, it made him happy to see that she had something that made her that proud. It meant that these past twenty years couldn't have been all bad for her. He was also happy to finally be getting some answers. Okay, so she had kids. What else? For the first time he noticed that she didn't have a ring on her finger. His first assumption was that there was either a divorce or a death. After all, the Casey he had known wasn't the kind of girl to just get 'knocked up'. She had higher standards than that. And he didn't think that had changed. But who knew. Twenty years did have a way of changing people. All he cared about right now was finding out what happened after she left Capeside. Right now he felt like he didn't know her at all anymore. She was different, and not knowing what had changed her was killing him.

Logan could feel that she was becoming increasingly more uncomfortable, and he knew it was mostly his fault. After all, he wasn't exactly taking all of this very well. His reactions were far from fair or ideal. So he decided it was about time to cut the nonsense of trying to hide what he was really thinking and just come out and say it. Casey had always been able to get him to share what he was thinking, so why should he pretend any differently now. She was a no-nonsense women and she deserved the truth. "Casey, look." he paused and took a deep breath before continuing. "I'm sorry I'm not exactly taking all of this perfectly" he chuckled a little, rubbing the back of his neck again, which was a bit of a habit of his when he was nervous. "I guess I'm just in a little bit of shock still... after you left, I didn't know if you were ever coming back; or if I would ever see you again" he stopped himself and quickly added the next part. "I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm glad you're here. It's fantastic seeing you. I'm not gonna lie, Casey, I missed you like crazy. And I don't know if I should be telling you that, but it's true. I'm like the happiest man alive right now." he stopped and took another breath, knowing he sounded ridiculous. But he knew he couldn't stop now.

"I just- I need to know what happened. And I'm not going to be upset, or bitter... I just need to know. I need to know you again, Casey" he gazed into her eyes now, pleading. Twenty years of wondering about her had finally caught up to him and he couldn't wait any longer. He didn't even care if he looked like a total fool or sounded completely crazy. They used to know each other like the back of their hands. No secrets. But right now he felt a huge elephant in the room and It just didn't feel right knowing that there were things they didn't know about each other. So he was going to change that. But first thing's first: they needed to clear the air and wipe the slate clean. "Just start from the beginning" he said softly, clearing off some old magazine that were scattered on the couch and offering her a seat before sitting down in the chair opposite of it. He didn't know how much she was willing to share, but he didn't care. He was ready to hear it all. And no matter what she said, he was determined to listen and accept everything. No more messing around. This was Casey for crying out loud! He would do whatever he needed to do to fix this...

[/blockquote]

-- WORDS 702
-- TAGS Casey
-- INSPIRATION Mr. Brightside - Boyce Avenue
-- NOTES No, I love yours! I'm having a lot of fun with this :]
-- LYRICS Once in a Lifetime - Keith Urban
-- TEMPLATE CREDIT Edited by myself. Font and color scheme by Arro @ Caution 2.0

[/blockquote]

[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | (: Casey smiled, attempting to ignore her flushing cheeks as she felt his eyes on her, and as she looked back into his eyes, he replied to her talking about her children. "More than anything in the world." She whispered in response, her eyes glazing over slightly as she thought about her sons and daughter and how they would have had a much better life had their father been Logan instead of Andrew. Was that a weird thought to have? Wanting her old best friend to be the father of her children? Now that she thought about it, yeah, it probably was, and it was also a tad embarrassing despite that she knew for a fact that Logan could not read her mind. But, still. Logan would have been a better father for them anyway, even if he was never the absolute best with children. With Logan, she would have never had to worry for their safety when she left the house.   She looked up again when he decided to cut the crap and finally just say what he wanted to. Which was slightly frightening, but Casey had to admit, she much preferred it to the awkward silences they were previously having. She was absolutely silent as he rambled on, staring up at him and blinking. She would have said something, but she didn't want to interrupt, so she kept her mouth shut. He needed to get this out, she understood that. So she waited, nodding slowly at points where she felt she needed to. She thought for a minute he was done, but then he continued, telling her that he needed to know her again, and slowly, a smile spread across her face again. What Casey honestly wanted to do now was just hug him, but he'd asked for an explanation, and so she decided it would probably be best if she just gave it to him now instead of spending excess time hugging him. Because Casey demanded very long hugs. More like standing cuddles than hugs, honestly.   "Okay." She said simply, and sat down across from him and placing her hands complacently in her lap. "After I left, I went to Texas. I'm not really quite sure why I chose Texas, but it was close enough to Louisiana without actually being Louisiana and I didn't really want to be in Louisiana because it reminded me too much of Casper." She paused. That probably wasn't really what he was referring to, but it counted as "everything", right?" "That was where I met Andrew Cahill. We dated for a while, and then he proposed, and I accepted, and we got married, and it was lovely, for a while, and then I got pregnant with Brandon. Which I was thrilled about, obviously, and Andrew was okay with it, he didn't seem as happy as I was but he wasn't openly disappointed or anything. Then along came Harry, and then Lucy, and I would have been just fine with having more, but Andrew wasn't."   She stopped to take a small breather here, looking down at her hands. This part in the story was not her finest moment, and she didn't want to tell it to Logan, but she didn't want to hide anything from him anymore, either. So she squeezed her eyes shut, and continued. "Andrew always drank a lot, but it got worse over time, with the kids. He was always whining about not having enough money to feed three children, and once, I told him that if he was so concerned about his precious money, that he should stop wasting it on alcohol, and that.." her voice cracked, and she winced, opening her eyes again and looking down at her fingernails. "That was when he first.. hit me. It only got worse over time, and at one point he just left for a few weeks, and I thought he was gone for good. But he came back, and he was even worse than he ever had been before, and I asked him- I asked him where he had been, and he just screamed incoherently at me, and I was just so angry, I screamed back at him, and then he was.. on top of me."   Casey continued to hide her eyes from Logan, not wanting to see his face. "I'd never thought.. that he'd try to kill me. And I thought he was going to, but Brandon came running around the corner and chased him off, and that was when I got a restraining order, and a divorce, but I didn't move from Texas until a while, not until after Lucy graduated." This was when she finally ventured to look at him again. "And.. here I am."

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[inclined]

_{* IT'S A LONG SHOT, BABY}

- - - i know it's true, but if anyone can make it

[/i]
{I'm bettin' on me and you}[/font]

[/color] - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -[/size][/center]
Logan watched as she sat down and began to sum up the last twenty years of her life. He smiled to himself as he observed her hands, placed firmly in her lap in a very motherly fashion. But his mood changed as she began to speak. He felt nervous, wondering how he would handle what she told him. But he was determined to take it in stride and not interrupt until she was finished. She began by explaining where she had went and why she had gone there. He nodded. Texas. It made sense. And it explained the light trace of a southern accent that lingered when she spoke. Logan found it endearing. It fit her for some reason. Then he heard her voice change again. 'That was where I met Andrew Cahill.' Logan pursed his lips and folded his hands together as she continued to explain that this was the man that she had married. To Logan, this was the man that got to be there for her when he couldn't. Logan hated to think about it. That should've been him. He knew Casey was a strong woman and was capable of taking care of herself, but in his mind she was still his to protect. He knew that sounded a little possessive, but he didn't care. Twenty years hadn't made him care for her any less.

His eyes studied her as she paused and took a breath, still not making eye contact and obviously reluctant to go on. He could tell that this was hard on her, and what she was about to say was probably going to be more difficult to take in, so he did his best to brace himself. 'Andrew always drank a lot, but it got worse over time, with the kids'. Logan could feel where this was going, and he didn't like it at all. He kept listening though, hoping that maybe his assumptions would be wrong. But then her voice cracked and her eyes shot down to her hands. His heart sank and he could hear to pain in her voice as she went on. 'That was when he first... hit me.' Logan's throat caught and he felt his fists clench instinctively. A whole new feeling washed over him as she went on to explain what had happened next. He felt responsible somehow. And angry. He wished with everything he had that he could have been there to stop it. To make her pain go away. She didn't deserve to go through that. But he knew couldn't change what had happened. He wasn't there to protect her, and that killed him. Somehow he was going to make this right, though. He needed to make it right...

His jaw was still rigid as she finished and her eyes timidly came back up to his. He looked away for a moment and tried to calm himself. It was harder than he thought, but he finally managed to push his thoughts to the side and focus. After all, this wasn't about him. This was about Casey. And he didn't need to make her feel anymore guilty than she probably already did. But what was he supposed to say? He took another breath before getting up and sitting down beside her. "I'm so sorry, Casey. You didn't deserve that." he said quietly, unable to meet her eyes as he placed a light hand on her knee. "I should have been there." he added, unable to stop the words before they escaped his mouth. He shook his head, his eyes studying an oil stain on his jeans. Finally he let out a sigh before turning his face towards hers. His eyes were soft as he silently searched her expression, taking in every bold but delicate feature. She truly was breathtaking. It had been a while since he had been this close to her. Without thinking, he reached up and lightly traced her cheekbone with the back of his hand. God, he'd never wanted to kiss her more than he did right now. But he stopped himself and dropped his hand, quickly averting his eyes. Wow, he was really good at making awkward situations, wasn't he?[/blockquote]

-- WORDS 710
-- TAGS Casey
-- INSPIRATION How to Save a Life - The Fray / Face Down & Your Guardian Angel - Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
-- NOTES Not as long as some of my other ones, but I hope it's okay! I couldn't think of anything else to put so I hope you have something to reply to xD
-- LYRICS Once in a Lifetime - Keith Urban
-- TEMPLATE CREDIT Edited by myself. Font and color scheme by Arro @ Caution 2.0

[/blockquote]

[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | (: Much to Casey's disappointment, Logan looked away when she looked up at him. She noticed with a tightening jaw that his hands were clenched. But before long, he got up, to her surprise, and sat down beside her and apologized. Her eyes softened, and she shook her head. She didn't completely agree with him on that one, she had always half blamed herself for it all, but she wasn't going to tell him that much, because at this rate he'd just defend her and she'd have to just take it, she wasn't going to argue with him, she just got back, after all. "No. It was my fault you weren't there, not yours. If I hadn't just up and left you, you would have been there. So don't say that." She insisted firmly, raising her eyebrows. She didn't want him to think that he could have prevented her own mistakes, she was too stubborn for her own good, it proved, running off to Texas as of her own free will was the unraveling of her, after all. She did only have herself to blame for that. And Casey did blame herself. For a lot of things, that honestly weren't even her fault, but she was the easiest person to blame, and she didn't see the point in blaming anyone else. Except for possibly Andrew. But she often wondered if she was a better wife, if she paid more attention to his needs, would he have done all that he did, would he still be an alcoholic? Casey didn't know. But she did know that whether or not it was fully her fault, she'd had her hand in it. She wasn't even sure whether or not she truly hated him. She did hate what he did, but grudges did not bode well with her. Her entire body froze when he reached up and touched her face. She caught her breath and she held it as she stared at him, waiting for him to do something. She didn't breathe again until he put his hand back down and looked away, and then she felt her whole body relax slightly, and she looked down. Casey wasn't sure what to say or do now, everything seemed so incredibly awkwad. Finally, she just leaned over and put her head on his shoulder like the good old days, sighing softly. "What about you?" She asked suddenly, tilting her head up so that she could see him out of the corner of her eye before looking back down and cuddling up closer to him. "Have you ... met anyone special?" Which sounded like a rather selfish question when she thought about it, but she had merely been curious. After all, he knew her story now. She was well entitled to know his too, right? Well, she'd like to think so, anyway. She would certainly be disappointed if she didn't get to hear his side of twenty years, however, and you couldn't really blame her. Casey reached up and brushed at her eyes, attempting to wipe away any tears that had gathered in them while she had told him her story. Casey hated crying. But, being the soft woman that she was, she cried at literally every sad and/or touching movie she had ever watched. Including Bambi. Bambi made her cry every stinking time. But she didn't want to cry straight away in front of Logan, anyway. Come on, twenty years, one failed marriage, three kids, and she was still such a baby? No, that wasn't how she wished to remembered, thank you very much.

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[inclined]

_{* IT'S A LONG SHOT, BABY}

- - - i know it's true, but if anyone can make it

[/i]
{I'm bettin' on me and you}[/font]

[/color] - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -[/size][/center]

"Lying here with you so close to me,
It's hard to fight these feelings when it feels so hard to breathe
I'm caught up in this moment, I'm caught up in your smile."

Logan considered arguing with Casey as she countered his apology, but over the course of three years, he'd learned that sometimes that wasn't the most productive idea. Casey was a free-spirit and she could be as stubborn as hell when she wanted to be. That was just one more thing Logan had always admired about her. But right now he could tell her mind was set on taking the blame, so he kept his mouth shut and disagreed silently to himself. It obviously wasn't all Casey's fault. Nothing she said could stop Logan from wondering what would have happened if he did things differently after she left. Would they have played out the way that they did? He quickly stopped himself before his mind could go on. No, he wasn't going to go down that road again. Over the years he'd exhausted every 'what-if' in the book, only to find that they were all null and void. Right now he was just happy she was back; he would save any arguing for later.

Logan let a smile crawl across his face as she leaned over and placed her head on his shoulder, just like old times. Almost instinctively, he put his arm over her head and wrapped it around her. Suddenly it seemed like everything was perfect in the world again. It was like twenty years had just vanished and everything was back to the way it had been before. Slowly, he felt his mind relax and the nervousness melted away. It just felt so right. He'd certainly missed this... her next word interrupted his thoughts and he glanced down at her just in time to see her eyes disappear as she snuggled closer to him. 'Have you... met anyone special?'. He felt his body tense up ever-so-slightly at the question and he desperately tried to form an answer that didn't make him sound totally pathetic. He'd dated a few other women, yes. But non that he would consider 'special'. In fact, his longest relationship lasted for three months. And that ended five years ago.

He sighed and looked down at her, idly brushing a piece of hair from her face and tucking it behind her ear. "No, I guess I'm just not as charming as I used to be" he smirked, attempting to turn the question into a joke. He hoped the answer would be sufficient for her. He wasn't quite ready to explain why he hadn't really dated in years... it wasn't something he'd openly admit, but he'd never really gotten over her. He didn't know why he couldn't move on. It frustrated him sometimes. Even after all these years, he could never forget about her. He didn't know if Casey had ever thought of him that way, but for some reason he didn't care. He didn't want anyone else. She was his best friend and as long as he had her by his side, he was content. Even if that meant being 'just friends' forever. They were more than just friends though, right? See, this is where he always got confused. He wasn't the best at picking up signals and it didn't help that she sent some pretty mixed ones. He didn't blame her, though. After all, they were young and stupid back then. But they were older now, and was curious to see how her signals might've changed.

"However," he added suddenly, lifting his eyebrows and pausing for effect. "You, my dear, are looking at the head mechanic of Capeside Auto" he said, mocking a tone of pride. "I'm livin' the dream" he finished sarcastically, a smirk coming back to his face and a small chuckle escaping his throat. Logan loved his profession, and he was proud of where he had gone, but it wasn't exactly a career you would brag about. She had shared her life story though, so he figured it was only fair that he share his as well. It wasn't very interesting, but at least they were catching up. He was starting to feel more relaxed now as the initial shock and awkwardness wore off and they began to slowly slip back into their old selves. It felt nice. Logan hoped she was feeling more comfortable too. "So what are you doing these days? he questioned, peeking down at her nuzzled into his shoulder. He knew she was a mom, but her kids were older now, and he didn't take Casey to be the type to just sit around and knit scarves. Unless she had picked up a new hobby over in Texas that he didn't know about...

"I've never opened up to anyone.
It's so hard to hold back when I'm holding you in my arms
But we don't need to rush this, let's just take it slow."

[/blockquote]

-- WORDS 782
-- TAGS Casey
-- INSPIRATION Just a Kiss - Lady Antebellum
-- NOTES Not my best, but I hope it's okay!
-- LYRICS Once in a Lifetime - Keith Urban/Just a Kiss - Lady Antebellum
-- TEMPLATE CREDIT Edited by myself. Font and color scheme by Arro @ Caution 2.0

[/blockquote]

[casey]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=width,300] OUTFIT | CHAI AS LOGAN | (: Casey was pleased with Logan as he avoided arguing with her as she had hoped he would. She really didn't want to argue her first day back, anyway. He always did seem to let her win, though. She rather appreciated that, because she really didn't like to argue, but she most certainly didn't like to lose, either. And it was rather apparent, to be honest. But she couldn't help it. Losing was not something she took very lightly. She had always been rather competitive, though she wasn't quite proud of it. She did hate to lose, at anything. It used to get her into a lot of trouble, when she was younger. She vaguely wondered if Logan remembered those days, though. Casey could feel him tensing up when she asked and she immediately regretted the question, but there was no turning back now. She raised her eyebrows, surprised, when he told her there wasn't anyone special in his life. She would have thought he would find at least someone, really. He was always so nice and so attractive. And she wasn't just saying that because he was Logan. Why shouldn't he have found someone to be happy with? She sort of had, for a while. Well, in a way. But, still. "Aw, well, I doubt that." She shook her head, smiling again as he brushed a strand of hair away from her face. She'd let him off the hook for now, though, on why. Later, she made no promises about questioning him. But for now.. He was safe enough. She would enjoy his giving her a better explanation, but she wasn't complaining. Yet. She'd be patient for now, let him have his time and get reaquainted with her. Then she would ambush him with the questions. He was probably just waiting for that, though. He knew her too well. She, for one, hadn't changed much. He didn't seem to have changed, either. That was nice to think of, like nothing had even changed, not over the course of twenty or more years. Casey had never done very well with change. She looked back up at him as he began with a "however" and then paused. Her eyebrows raised expectantly as she waited for him to finish his sentence, and then she smiled widely. "Really?" She asked excitedly, clapping her hands together like an excited child. "Oh, I'm so proud of you, Logan!" She squealed, wrapping her arms around him for an even closer embrace. She loosened her grip to look back up again and smile. He did always have a way with cars. Such the difference with Casey, who didn't even know what kind of car she owned. When asked, she would answer, "well, it's a van. and it's silver. and it's pretty." and then she'd point it out so they could see it for themselves. Casey snuggled back into his shoulder again as he asked what she was doing nowadays, and she chuckled slightly. "I am a librarian. Are you quite shocked?" She asked, looking back up at him again and wiggling her eyebrows playfully. Casey never knew what she wanted to do with her life, all she knew that what she wanted to be was a mother. Being a librarian, just sounded like fun. Not the mean kind that stalked around the shelves waiting for someone to whisper so she could jump around the corner and "SHHH" them, though, the nice one, hopefully. Even though most of her colleagues were a lot older than herself. It seemed not a lot of people under sixty were librarians anymore. And she was only forty five. But she didn't mind. She loved older people. They were either really funny, or really sweet. Still, she enjoyed her job.

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